toilet flush

When you find yourself swirling down the toilet of negativity, catastrophizing the possible, future, maybe, might, what if, not-yet-taken-place event that is lodged in your prefrontal cortex, try this.

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guilty or selfish

I am finding that people are slightly confused between the terms guilty and selfish. They will say “I feel so bad [guilty] for even being here and talking about my own needs,” when they have constant anxiety humming in the background. And they will compare their needs to something such as a friend suffering from cancer as if their feelings do not matter, even though the situations are different, and they obviously had no part in causing the others heartache.

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body telling you

Life is a balance of holding on and letting go. When we get overwhelmed it is typically due to the feeling that too much is going on, but it can also be eustress, stress caused by good things happening.

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ugly duckling

Reframing is a very popular idea that is used in everything from fairytales to commercials. Recall that the ugly duckling realized in the end that he was actually quite a beautiful swan.

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therapy is odd duck

Most people who seek counseling or some form of therapy do so as a last resort. Whatever is bothering them has not been solvable, or has reached the point it is significantly interfering with their life in one or more ways.

Tangled is a word that comes to mind.

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social anxiety disorder

Since I’m feeling self doubt….

I thought I’d explore it again since it crops up from time to time for everyone.

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wasting your life

I was struck by a quote I saw by philosopher Eric Hoffer in the Boston Globe: “The feeling of being hurried is not usually the result of living a full life and having no time. It is born of a vague fear that we are wasting our life.”

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I saw this story and it had no author attributed to it, and I loved the analogy. It is one I use frequently with clients who are attached to ideas and habits that bring them pain repeatedly.

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one good thing

Having just returned from the Psychotherapy Networker Symposium in Washington, DC, I am bursting with new ideas and approaches to try both professionally and personally. This annual conference has a cadre of instructors that represent the best psychotherapy has to offer in the the field: Jon Kabat-Zinn, John and Julie Gottman, Esther Perel, Daniel Siegel, Bessel van der Kolk, Diane Ackerman, Margaret Wehrenberg just to name a few.

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choices

According to Barry Schwartz in his excellent book The Paradox of Choice, you become a satisficer. You make choices that are  “good enough.”

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