workaholism

When you are an entrepreneur, it is easy to get consumed by what I call the anxious underbelly of small business ownership. When you find that you cannot shut off the valve of workaholism, and you cannot stop obsessing about the never ending to-do list, it is time to reassess. Read more

shame triggers for women

When I think about shame triggers and how they bloom, I am immediately taken back to a story of myself in the sixth grade. This was when elementary school went from 1st-6th grade; formal kindergarten was not yet in existence.
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anger, anger management, assertiveness, counseling, shame, shame triggers, therapy

Anger management for women is often bound up in shame. The Western culture in which we live places women in a double bind when they speak up, especially at work, sometimes labeling them angry, loud or pushy. Read more

anger codependency anxiety

Or is your anger somewhere on this continuum? I want to challenge the belief that anger is harmful. Read more

what every body says

I just finished an interesting book about reading body language written by Joe Navarro, an ex-FBI agent:

What Every Body Is Saying, 2008, Harper by Joe Navarro and Marvin Karlins, PhD

What interested me the most was the author’s scientific comparisons and parallels to the limbic system as the primary generator of physical behaviors by our bodies that are largely unconscious.

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categories

While I was standing on the corner of the busiest intersection in Wilmington protesting HB2, a recently passed law in NC which discriminates against the LGBTQ population and removes the right of local municipalities to set their own minimum wage and anti-discrimination ordinances, I began to start categorizing those that passed by in their cars. This is a common activity of our brains used to make meaning in our lives; we cannot help but do it.

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meta reflections

“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” – Mahatma Gandhi

You know how you see inspirational quotes all the time on social media? Well this time I had the happy occasion to feel it as it was happening to me. On many levels.

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loneliness

If you are asking this question, you must have some belief that negative self talk, self flagellation or just simply beating yourself up is a helpful device to get or keep yourself motivated.  Let’s look at that more closely since most people do engage in this behavior quite frequently.

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whats new

More and more I realize that there is nothing new under the sun, but how it is said is what makes it new. How you hear it makes it new, and when you hear it makes it new. Whether or not your antenna is up makes it new… or not.

Often that reception is problematic.

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magic ratio of praise

Your children are like so much wet cement according to Time Magazine, in that they are impressionable at an early age. Your words and actions make impressions that will ‘harden’ over time and guide their sense of identity. A large portion of our job as parents is to guide, correct and discipline them. While this is all true, it is important to guard how much you discipline (or criticize) in the guise of discipline and how much you praise.

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